We are the rules we make. Dr Albert Ellis, The father of Cognitive Behaviourial Psychology outlined 12 most of the common rules people have that causes them to suffer. To become aware of them is the first stage. Thereafter work on reducing their effects.
Here's to Rational Living.
Those of you who would like to print this out to share with others you may download the pdf at this
12 Irrational Beliefs Download
Here's to Rational Living.
Those of you who would like to print this out to share with others you may download the pdf at this
12 Irrational Beliefs Download
1. The idea that it is a dire necessity for
adults to be loved by significant others for almost everything they do--
Instead
of their concentrating on their own self-respect, on
winning approval for practical purposes, and on
loving rather than on being loved.
2. The idea that certain acts are awful or
wicked, and that people who perform such acts
should be severely damned --
Instead of the idea that certain
acts are self-defeating or antisocial, and
that people who perform such acts are behaving stupidly,
ignorantly, or neurotically, and would be
better helped to change. People's poor behaviors do not make them rotten
individuals.
3. The idea that it is horrible when
things are not the way we like them to
be--
Instead of the idea that it is too bad, that we would better try to
change or control bad conditions so that they become more satisfactory, and,
if that is not possible, we had better temporarily accept
and gracefully lump their existence.
4. The idea that human misery is
invariably externally caused and is forced on us by outside people and events
Instead
of the idea that neurosis is largely caused by
the view that we take of unfortunate
conditions.
5. The idea that if
something is or may be dangerous or fearsome we should be terribly upset
and endlessly obsess about it--
Instead of the idea that one would
better frankly face it and render it non-dangerous and, when that
is not possible, accept the inevitable.
6. The idea that it is easier to avoid than
to face life difficulties and self-responsibilities Instead of the idea that the
so-called easy way is usually much harder in the long run.
7. The idea that we
absolutely need something other or stronger or greater than ourselves on
which to rely --
Instead of the idea that it is better to take the risks
of thinking and acting less dependently.
8. The idea that
we should be thoroughly competent, intelligent, and achieving in all
possible respects --
Instead of the idea that we would better do rather than
always need to do well, and accept ourselves as quite imperfect
creatures, who have general human limitations and specific fallibilities.
9. The idea that because
something once strongly affected our life, it should indefinitely
affect it --
Instead of the idea that we can learn from our past
experiences but not be overly-attached to or prejudiced by them.
10. The idea
that we must have certain
and perfect control over things --
Instead of the idea that the
world is full of improbability and chance and that we can
still enjoy life despite this.
11. The idea
that human happiness can be achieved by inertia and inaction --
Instead
of the idea that we tend to be happiest when we are vitally absorbed in
creative pursuits, or when we are devoting ourselves to people or projects
outside ourselves.
12. The idea that we have virtually no
control over our emotions and that we cannot help feeling disturbed about
things --
Instead of the idea that we have real
control over our destructive emotions if we choose to work at changing
the “musturbatory” hypotheses which we often employ to create them.
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